Jonathon Hills
"HANG UP THE CALL!" - Jonathon Hills Introduction Jonathon Hills, Host of the Buddhism Hotline Appearance Jonathon Willis Hills is white and ethnically German-Jewish, and possibly 40% Swedish as well according to [[Mathis Miles|'Mathis Miles']], '''but claims to be 42% African American, citing Ancestry.com. Further confuddling this, is that Kent Kennedy once searched up Jonathon's Ancestry results revealing he was mostly European but has traces of Middle Eastern and North African descent. He has brown hair and an average build. He is always seen wearing a suit, which he stated is a designer model. He has a bit of curly hair, a medium sized nose, and brown/black eyes. He has also said he "slowly and painfully" castrated himself with a butter knife, though this is very debatable as Jacob and Liquid have both said that Jonathon does have a penis but is very small with Jonathon's own estimations of it before the castration being "nearly 1 inch". It's possible that Jonathon did attempt a castration but failed or stopped midway as Mathis Miles saw Jonathon's penis in the episode "Vaccines cause Autism" stating that his penis was "scarred and bloody". During a stream, Jonathon had his shirt removed to reveal that he actually has a very lean physique. Personality Although Jonathon may appear to be calm and outgoing at first, he will show his angry and malevolent side very easily upon being agitated. He often takes his anger out on his decor such as his fake plants, also known as Jonathon's Plant. In addition, he is noted to take out of his anger on his technical supervisors and his co-hosts. Jonathon claims to be a Buddhist but seems to follow a corrupted version of Buddhism, also known as Jonathonist Buddhism. Although preaching that video games are against Buddhism, Jonathon has been caught playing Minecraft & Roblox multiple times. Jonathon has also claimed that sex, which he refers to as "S-Word contact" is against Buddhism, although on January 17, 2019, Jonathon accidentally revealed that he has had sex with his adoptive mother. Jonathon has shown himself to be homosexual or bisexual, which was exposed after it was discovered he was a member of Ram Ranch. Throughout the show Jonathon has made several contradictory statements on his position on homosexuality, doing multiple streams on why homosexuality should be accepted and multiple streams on why it shouldn't. . He has also groped several of his co-hosts non-consensually and has shown strong romantic and sexual interests in his co-hosts, such as Carl Shieth. In the Episode "Charlie Fraser Returns", Charlie Fraser reported noticing several large "dildos" (objects shaped similarly to the male genitalia designed for sexual pleasure) ranging in size from 12-36 inches, and in the episode "6ix9ine is a Devil Worshipper", Ariana got a hold of a dildo owned by Jonathon and did not deny the existence of the dildo. Another strange rule under Jonathonist Buddhism is that you are not allowed to eat any food besides green peas. Jonathon has created his own brand of green peas, Jonathon's Homestyle Green Peas. It is unknown how Jonathon would be able to live on a strict diet of green peas for a presumably very long time, but Jonathon has broken his many self imposed rules before, so it is likely this rule is also broken. Jonathon is a furry, and a brony Jonathon Hills has many times both praised and denounced furries and bronies both , reportedly having 42 copies of ''My Little Pony''' for the DS™, as told by [[Mike Hard|'Mike Hard']]' (this would obviously also go against his position that video games are a sin). Jonathon later has stated that Twilight Sparkle is his favorite character from the show. In addition, Jonathon seems to be a fan of both Jake and Logan Paul. Jonathon Hills says 'You can shove it up my rectum'sic when people make mean or offensive remarks. When a loud sound has been played Jonathon begins to flop around and throw stuff in anger, caused by the loud noises. This can 'wind' Jonathon up making him tenser during the show. But if he hears an Anime or K/J Pop song he gets happy and dances. He also might have a lack of intelligence because of his dad. When a guest is with Jonathon, loud sounds cause him to seek comfort and so he starts to feel the guests, such as Dr. Gregory Pecks Ph.D., Eddie Cox, and Mike Hard, etc. Jonathon has a tic of some form, repeating a singular phrase multiple times until satisfied or interrupted. History Jonathon was born in San Diego, California, and 3 months after he was born his biological parents, one of which he claimed to be African-American (which was highly disputed and later confirmed to be false), and one of which is nicknamed Big Buddha, died in a car accident and he was adopted after spending 7 years in an orphanage. He at one point claimed that he was created asexually by Buddha himself, and his foster parents found him at their doorstep in a basket also containing green peas, needless to say this is extremely improbable. Jonathon originally claimed he became a born again Buddhist and was inspired by his pastor Joseph to create the Hotline after coming across another show called the Jesus Chatline, but later dropped this and claimed that the family he was adopted into (with Jerry Hills as the patriarch), was a Buddhist Family and Jerry was in Nepal for most of Jonathon's childhood and adolescence attempting to meditate in a cave. Jerry could actually be the source of Jonathon's racism towards Indian people and homophobia along with many other quirks, it's possible that Jerry taught Jonathon his corrupted version of Buddhism. Jonathon has a twin brother, only calling himself "Liquid Jonathon", who made his presence known in the episode Beer is NOT Okay. An unknown caller attempted to research Jonathon's origins revealing he is not African American and is actually of German-Jewish ethnically. Jonathon and Liquid's grandparents were a Jewish couple who survived the Holocaust with the couple's son being the father of Jonathon born circa 1970 (at the least). After World War II Jonathon's grandparents and father moved to the United States of America as they believed they would be safe there, as in their eyes America defeated the Nazis. Jonathon's father is essentially pure-blooded Jewish with his parents being German in nationality, not ethnicity. Jonathon's father met a woman in his college who was of Muslim heritage but moved to America. Jonathon's biological father and mother had sex with Jonathon's mother giving birth to twins: "Liquid" and Jonathon Hills but 3 months after they were born, Jonathon and Liquid's parents died in a car accident. This information was later confirmed and the research commended by Liquid Jonathon. Katie Hills Jonathon was once married to a woman named Katie, but they are believed to have divorced sometime before the creation of the Hotline. Callers would often joke about having sex with her, but it was later revealed that after (and possibly before) their divorce, she was, in fact, having sex with multiple men, including Mathis MilesAfter Mathis Miles was finally freed from being locked in Jonathon's closet, he admitted to Gregory that he frequently had sex with Katie., Gregory Pecks and frequent callers such as [[Deus03|'''Deus03]]. ''' Jonathon claims that sex (or S-word contact) is against Buddhism, and this is believed to be the reason for the downfall of the marriage. However, in June of 2016, it was revealed Jonathon had a son named though Maths claims that Javon is his son and Katie was attempting to get child support payments from Jonathon. Whether this is true or not is unknown, though it is unlikely that Jonathan will ever come clean about the events regarding his ex-wife. Whenever this is brought up, Jonathon typically defends himself by claiming that he has his children through "prayers to Buddha". Nobody knows where exactly Katie Hills is, but she is often having sex with multiple men. Whether this is for her own pleasure, or to anger Johnathon, is unknown. There is a theory that she is infact still married to Jonathon and is having sex with other men to satisfy Jonathan's secret cuckolding fetish. Continuing In August 2018, Gregory Pecks attempted to murder Jonathon Hills. He claims he tried to kill Jonathon because he believed he was a scammer with no real concern for Buddhism or those seeking religion. Jonathon believes he has Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) as a result of his attempted murder by Gregory. After it was discovered that Jonathon survived, he breifly dropped the Buddhism Hotline in favor of "Live with Jonathon Hills", which focused on politics. Although Jonathon claimed he was willing to debate his opinions, he would often vehemently demand his technical supervisors shut off any caller with an opposing opinion. He brought back the Buddhism Hotline on December 3, 2018 On October 4th, 2018 Muhammad Smith, a recent addition to the cast (who is a known dendrophiliac) stole Jonathon's plant and ran with it colluding with Deus03 and giving the plant away as a sex slave. Deus03 then contacted Jonathon on air in order to deal with Jonathon stating he will give Jonathon's plant back if Jonathon gives Ariana as a slave in return, Jonathon would also receive $2000 as compensation but in a bid for Ariana, Deus03 stated that Liquid Jonathon gave a bid of $20000 dollars for Ariana. Jonathon was confused as to what the currency he would be given if he gave Ariana away to which Deus03 replied he was using American dollars, Jonathon was offended at the use of American dollars but Deus03 still talked with him about giving Ariana, much to her horror. Ariana soon hung up the call in a bid to save herself from slavery. As of December 2018, Jonathon appeared to have slipped into a coma after being severely injured by Muhammad Smith, according to Ariana and it was believed that he would have never recovered. Criminal Record In addition to Jonathon's highly scandalous background, Jonathon was noted to have a large Criminal record. He has most notably been involved in several acts of assault, battery, and kidnapping. Jonathon has been under FBI investigation and probation for a long time, and On June 10th, 2018, Johnathon was arrested but has since been released on bail. '''Mathis: It was revealed that, when Mathis was the technical supervisor, he was being exploited due to his mental deficiency. Jonathon was keeping him in a cage, feeding him dog food, and only paying him 10¢ an hour which is clearly highly illegal as the minimum wage is $11/hour in his home state of California. In August and December of 2016, respectively, Jonathon claimed that Mathis was dead, but in reality, he was keeping him locked up in his basement. For a long time, he claimed that Mathis was on a vacation in the Bahamas, but it was later revealed that he was locked in Jonathon's closet Joe Smalls: '''Jonathon has been filmed torturing and assaulting Joe Smalls in the woods on different occasions, and was accused of rape by Joe. It is also suspected that Jonathon has murdered Joe. '''Charlie: '''There is a video on the Buddhism Hotline twitter showing Charlie being tortured. When Charlie finally retired, it was claimed by Jonathon he did that because he wanted to go back to his home state of Alaska, but in reality, he retired because he was tired of the mistreatment he faced from Jonathon. Recently, he called into the show and claimed that he was shipped off to the Bahamas following retirement and has been locked up in an unknown location there. '''Rajeev: It is very obvious that Jonathon abuses and assaults Rajeev, on an essentially regular basis. When Jonathon claimed that Rajeev was making more than he did in India, he said that he was being paid $1 per month, and was making $500 a month (or ₹'''34,425 a month) in India. Once again this is way below the minimum wage since the average stream lasts for around 1-2 hours. He also raped Rajeev on stream. '''Assassination attempts: A caller on the unrelated Jehovah's Witness Chatline claiming to be a member of the FBI, claimed that Jonathon attempted to assassinate Andre, the host of the show, and Nicholas Hayes, the host of the Hinduism Chatline. Green Peas: 'In a tweet by Doctor Gregory Pecks Ph.D., he accused Jonathan of opening up a sweatshop that exploits child labor so he can produce his green peas at a low price, but then sell them for much higher. In addition, the product is believed to have been a veiled attempt at selling cocaine and possibly a cover up for the kidnapping of Mathis Miles. Enemy & Allied Hotlines Jonathon Hills has been seen many times interacting with other competing hotlines, oftentimes leading to serious war between these hotlines. One of the most famous rivalries is between The Buddhism Hotline's host Jonathon Hills and The Hinduism Chatline's host Nicholas Hayes, despite them having some similar ideals such as them both liking communism and dislike violence, Nicolas Hayes is more of a pacifist and a good sport as well as honest and benevolent. Often times fighting between these two hotlines are relatively common from time to time, often times Nicholas Hayes criticizes The Buddhism Hotline and sometimes has his song played Highway to Reincarnation on The Buddhism Hotline specifically to trigger Jonathon. He even made a video on June 23, 2018, comparing Jonathon's Homestyle Green Peas with regular Walmart peas, and he was very upset, complaining about the high price and even got sick by the end of the stream. It should also be known that Rajeev Kapoor may actually be allied with Nicholas Hayes. To this day rivalry still continues and it is unknown which hotline shall prevail in the end though it is very likely as The Buddhism Hotline would win in the end as Jonathon has reportedly attempted assassination attempt's on Nicholas Hayes despite Hayes being for the most part pacifistic and seeks to stop him through non-violent methods which might lead to his downfall. Another Famous rivalry though not an official hotline has been against Jonathon Hills and [[Brittany Venti|'Brittany Venti]] where they criticize each other and the rivalry is so strong against each other that Jonathon made an entire stream against her and even made a diss track against Britanny though she has not suffered any permanent, nor any serious damage towards her reputation, it could be arguably said that it actually increased it. He has also shown distaste for The Jesus Chatline and Haulin Ass and donators have been found spreading Buddhist propaganda onto Haulin Asses donations threatening the host T.Rucker. Jonathon Hill's has also had been called by people such as Leroy Sinclair, though this was most likely an imposter. He has also claimed that both Christianity & Neon Christianity are false religions and will send everyone to hell. Though it is should be known that Jonathonist Buddhism was likely heavily inspired by both religions. He has also had other hotlines such as the Jehovah's Witness Hotline run by the host Andre Lewis which share some similarities between the two hotlines as they both have relatively abusive and rude hosts, however a major difference is that Andre has a strong dislike towards furries and has said the "n-word" once so they are likely major enemies. It is also to be known that it is likely that Jonathon might have attempted to assassinate Andre due to him being a rival hotline preaching a different religion. which likely confirms them as serious rivals. This is further confirmed by Jonathon hating The Jehovah's Witness religion. He also had contact with the host of The Autism Hotline who called into The Buddhism Hotline likely either for his autistic brethren or just for attention due to Jonathon taking away viewers to watch Jonathon's show. And began to fight with Jonathon Hills which has made them strong enemies. With Jonathon calling The Autism Hotline as "The A-Tism Hotline" and asking what it was before him giving up and hung up on him. While Jonathon Hills has been shown to be aggressive to other hotlines, he has shown mild support for other hotlines such as The Antifa Hotline which would make sense because they are both radical democrats who think they are "Communist" or "Anarchist" despite knowing little to nothing about the ideologies whatsoever. However, it is debatable if they are allies as recently people talking about Jonathon on The Antifa Hotline get immediately hung up on. Quotes/Catchprases *''"You need to let buddha come inside of you!"'' *''"Hang up the call!"'' *''"What is a cuck?"'' *''"Did you just say the (letter)-word?"'' *''"That is a Photoshop!"'' *''"I am 42% African-Americon."'' *''"Have you checked your privilege(s)?"'' *''"Are you a cis-white male?"'' *''"Are you a Klondike bar?"'' *''"This is Jonathon Hills and you're live on the Buddhism Hotline."'' *''"You can shove it up my rectum!"sic'' *''"Jonathon's Homestyle: Green Peas for the low, low price of $39.99"'' *''"Mister T-word!"'' *''"It's a Ram Ranch homosexual!"'' *''"You know what's really up? The ceiling." '' *''"Do not call him a him because he is not a him." Trivia * Jonathon is possibly dyslexic as shown in his frequent mispronunciation of words. * Jonathon was rumored in April 2018 and again in June 27th to have committed suicide at the request of 'Kent Kennedy', but these rumors were obviously false. * Jonathon is quite weak as shown when he is frequently beaten by co-hosts such as Mathis Miles and Charlie Fraser so it is unknown how he is able to restrain these co-hosts in his basement; (according to theories), though it is most likely through deception. * For some reason instead of calling obese people fat people he calls them "High Mass Individuals". * Jonathon's surname, Hills is actually quite contradictory in terms of origin as it has been stated that he took Katie's surname as his own yet Jerry has been confirmed to have the surname Hills. * "Jonathon" is believed to be a fake name. It has been claimed by callers that his real name is Wesley, but gets extremely upset when someone says that. Rajeev has claimed that Willis is actually his first name, and not just his middle name. * Jonathon is also a "musician" making the song Buddha's Plan, which he claims is original yet is a parody of Drake's "God's Plan" * Jonathon also believes himself to have some form of supernatural power attempting to summon some form of divine wrath upon Theodore and co. while at a graveyard. * Johnathon once cursed on stream saying "Say go fuck yourself" (as a means of seemingly directing his co-hosts but this failed entirely), despite berating those who curse. * Jonathon believes in using shock therapy, a pseudo-scientific psychological treatment for homosexuality, stating he believes Eddie Cox and possibly other homosexuals should be placed under electroshock. * On June 10, 2018. It's speculated that Jonathon raped Rajeev on air when Rajeev suffered an asthma attack. he denies it, but, in a video made to clear the incident up, Rajeev is clearly seen with a black eye. * Johnathon doesn't like Rajeev due to his 'unconscious' biases based on the racist language he uses to speak to Rajeev when 'muted'. * Jonathon sometimes partakes in a sexual offense called "the Pain Game" wherein which groping is commonly attributed to. * It seems that Jonathon believes that American is a language and that Indian is a language. * Jonathon claims that video games are against Buddhism, yet is believed to have produced Minecraft content before the creation of the Hotline streamed himself playing MLP roleplay on Minecraft along with Rajeev Kapoor on July 11, 2018. * Jonathon lives in the US but seems to be Canadophile and Anti-American. * Jonathon Hills calls the social media website Facebook, 'The Book of Face' * During a stream expressing his love for Logan Paul and his content he got his first serious call in a long time and deemed the caller the "model caller" * According to Jonathon Hills, he considers himself to be a Communist, however, he also says he is a major supporter of Hillary Clinton and sells his merchandise at extremely high prices. * Jonathon can be so gullible that he actually confused The USSR Anthem, The Nazi Germany Anthem, The US National Anthem and many more songs for the Canadian national anthem. * It could actually possible that Jonathon may actually be a prophet in some regard due to him avoiding most of his criminal charges including rape and murder and getting very lax sentences, and most strangely of all surviving getting shot in the chest and managing around a week later to dance for an hour and a half despite his obvious lack of fitness. However, this could be seen as ''Plot Armor or simply dumb luck within the show's universe. * Jonathon Hills is often called "Brother" by Liquid Jonathon in reference to the Metal Gear character of similar name: Liquid Snake . This could mean that Jonathon is essentially analogous to mainstay character of the Metal Gear franchise: Solid Snake with Liquid and Solid Snake being cloned from the character: Big Boss. * In the stream "S-Contact is a sin" Jonathon took his plant to have sex with. However, his staggeringly short time with it is noted as he seemingly ejaculated after 10 or so seconds. * On August 2, 2018, a kid was seen running around Jonathon's backyard during a charity livestream. * Jonathon seems to reject science as a whole and is a believer of the Flat Earth theory. * He has the Standard Ram Ranch Pass. * On January 13, 2019, it was confirmed by Amal that Jonathon had shoved cans of Jonathon's Homestyle Green Peas in his rectum. Notes Category:Characters Category:Crew Category:Jonathon Hills